Emotionally drained at workplace?14 new ways to uplift yourself

Unless you have been living under a rock, I’m sure you would have come across terms like ‘self love’, ‘self care’ and ‘mindfulness’. Every video in social media and every post on Facebook and Instagram is about people taking care of themselves, having a relaxing routine, taking a vacation particularly a ‘staycation’ at some exotic location. People began developing new hobbies, started baking, gardening, started creative blogs (ahem, ahem) and so on and so forth to take care of their inner self. But have you ever wondered why are you only now learning about these terms? Were our previous generations not aware of such measures or were they simply not interested in it. Did people not garden, bake, exercise or  go on vacations in the past? I’m sure they did but why then now all this focus on oneself. I’ll tell you why, what has changed is the intensity with which we are valuing our work and the workplace. Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong in dedicating your life to work and excelling at your career however, what we often do not realise and lack is the fine balance of it. I have grown up in a family where both my parents worked and they worked hard. Everyday was a struggle but yet once home we had them to ourselves. There was no interruption from the workplace, no last minute meetings or late night deadlines to achieve. They gave their best at work and left “work” at the workplace. This is almost impossible now with the “cloud connectivity” and constant notifications popping up from our multiple devices. We want to be productive even in our sleep and there is no rest for our bodies.Many of us are emotionally drained and find it hard to uplift our inner self.

Why we are emotionally drained ?

The boundary between work and home is getting blurred and this is causing us great mental anguish, distress, stress and a feeling of being burnt out. Hence our constant yearning to  escape this chaotic world via our expensive hobbies and self care routines. I have youngsters who come to the OPD with complaints of lack of sleep, feelings of anxiety and generalised body ache with no mood nor motivation left in life. They are aged minds stuck in a young persons body. This is also why we are now witnessing a pandemic of mental health disorders and non-communicable illnesses like diabetes and hypertension among youngsters. It doesn’t have to be like this and there are ways to reclaim our balance between work and life without compromising on time, health or productivity.

Read here to learn more about being emotionally drained.

14 tips for work life balance

If you are emotionally drained at workplace , I have listed below 14 activities and habits that everyone can follow at the workplace to achieve this sense of balance.

1.Exercising at the workplace– Though the lunch timings are ideal to sit around and gossip about the boss, make an effort to find a ‘walking buddy’ and go walking across your campus each day. This can become an excellent time to destress and talk about your day with your colleague and help you reach in the requisite number of step counts each day.Lets not be a sitting duck without stepping out of the comforts of the four walls like I mentioned in the blog “Sitting is the new smoking?“11 ways to avoid being a ‘sitter’. Also, you do not have to have a dedicated time outside of work to complete your exercise.

2. Have impromptu lunch outings with colleagues– we spend one third of our lifetime at the workplace and our colleagues eventually become like family. It feels wonderful to occasionally eat out with them and interact with them in ‘non-work’ settings. You will be amazed to discover many wonderful sides to yours and their personality- the heart will learn to smile again and work will not be such a burden after all.

3. Join a ‘club’– I have a professor at my workplace who everyone believes ‘has it all’- charm, personality, dedication  and a passion to succeed in equal measure. What he once told piqued at my conscience, he asked us “what is the other thing you do in life”? Yes, for some of us who are not artistically talented, we tend to believe that our ‘work defines our life’ but that is not so. Join a club at the workplace- the employee engagement group, the sports club, the ethics club or simply the newsletter. You can find many such activities at your workplace if you look out for them. You need not exceed at any of these to be part of the club and we can start from any point in the graph. You can build  your social circle and also will give you the much needed “break” from work at the workplace itself.

4. Take less on your “plate”– there is a tendency amongst us especially the junior staff (I am also one of them) to take too many things on our plate. Saying ‘yes’ to every opportunity which comes our way will only make us that much more stressed and would make us emotionally drained. Our efficiency is determined by not ‘how much’ we can do but ‘how well’ you do it. So the next time you get some new task that does not excite you learn to say a bold and firm ‘NO’ and do not feel guilty about it.

5. Give yourself shorter deadlines– I read somewhere that work expands to occupy the time available, its called the Parkinson’s law. This habit of complacency and pushing things for another date begins right from our childhood- our science projects will not be worked upon until the due date is tomorrow. Similarly, when given tasks at work, we tend to give a very long deadline only to find ourselves working on it at the penultimate moment. Since the quality of our output is same regardless of the time given its better to keep shorter more feasible deadlines. This way we will achieve more in less time and be less stressed about any impending target.

6. You are ‘enough’– we are a generation of unsatisfied people. Contentment and satisfaction was inherent in our parents’ times. No matter how they lived or where they worked they were a content generation. They worked the same job, lived in the same house and drove the same vehicle for years. We on the other hand are discontent with everything around us. The constant pressure to upgrade our lifestyle is huge- be it our iPhones or our smartwatches we need the most latest gadgets in life. No one works and retires in the same organisation anymore. The constant search to earn more and acquire more has made us work insane amount of hours compromising on our health and sleep and thus we are emotionally drained very soon. We are in the constant state of ‘becoming better’. We need to truly understand that ‘we are good enough’. Let’s learn to enjoy what we have in the ‘now’ and be a little more content.

7. Expand your circle of friends– at your workplace it is never a good idea to have only one set of friends and walk around like a pack of wolves everywhere you go. You will be amazed by how enriching your interactions with the secretary, the coffee guy, the security personnel and the cleaning lady can be! I cherish the salute that I exchange with my security personnel every morning or the short chat that my cleaning lady engages in when I go to the washroom. These are the interactions which will ground us, which will make us grateful about our life and work and give us a sense of belonging at the workplace.

8. Never miss an opportunity to ‘learn new things’– your organisation will regularly conduct up-skilling workshops, short courses or seminars and talks by imminent personalities. Don’t be like the proverbial ‘frog stuck in the well’ and only specialise in your field of expertise. It’s always good to know what others are doing out there. Maybe this new knowledge or technology can help you do your current work more efficiently. It can also become a platform for you to showcase your achievements. Keep your calendar open for such exciting opportunities the next time they come your way.

9. Organise your work desk and room– a messy desk is a productivity killer. The visual clutter can clearly make your mind more chaotic and stressed. The joy that a clean room and an organised desk brings is unmatched. The next time you feel stressed at work take a step back and look at your desk. Spend 30 minutes to sort out the papers and set right the décor. Add some life to your area by bringing in some indoor plants or a smart décor item and feel your inner self jump in elation.

10. Mentor a junior– mentoring someone who is much younger or early in their career path can also bring a sense of purpose to you. It can help hone your managerial skills and set you up for future  responsibilities if you are a mentor. It works both ways, so if you are a young worker then seek a mentor at your workplace. This relationship can shield you from making rookie mistakes and give you a sense of direction at work if you are a mentee.

11. Utilise your ‘leaves’– where I work I see many senior professionals working day in and day out without taking any breaks or leaves. They equate their presence with productivity. This attitude is often counterproductive and we become emotionally drained at workplace. Every once in a while its good to take a day off from work to just relax at home, spend some time with family or just cook a killer meal. Coming back fresh to work from a relaxing mid-week break might just be the just the thing you need.

12. Delegate, delegate, delegate– we need not be that one person doing everything at work. As we grow up the ladder its best to delegate several tasks to others and also try to automate the rest of them. Your mundane task can be a learning opportunity for a youngster so always ‘share your load’.

13. Keep your personal life private– I have noticed some people, women especially who divulge every thing about their day to day life including the arguments they had to everyone who cares to listen. Firstly, this is very unprofessional to do so. You portray a very negative image and people will begin to avoid you at all cost. Secondly, you might become the object of ridicule at the office. Maintain a dignified presence at the workplace and do not air your dirty laundry here.

14. Learn to work within the stipulated time– this tip is similar to the one about taking leaves. There is no glory to be gained by spending extra hours at the workplace. The time spent at home with loved ones is as important as the time spent at work. I see many professionals either staying back or taking their work back home. While this might be aimed at pleasing the management ultimately it would lead to burn out and stress.  We portray an image that we are unable to finish tasks within the stipulated time. Keep your home space sacrosanct. If need be switch of your email notifications until morning.

15. Finally work in an organisation that allows you to do most of the above. Research well about the work culture, about the place before committing to anything. Even if the pay is not very lucrative what you are bargaining in return will be a stress free and peaceful life and you don’t have to complain about being emotionally drained. Also you will never again need to punch a hole in your pockets in search of expensive travel and ‘mindful routines’.